5 Things To Do Before Your Next Relationship

Relationship expert and author Laura Bilotta of the dating website Single in the City (singleinthecity.ca) offers her tips for getting back into the dating game.

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Check Your Baggage Before You Start A New Relationship

If you’re recently single after a long-term relationship, it’s important to manage your own baggage before developing new romantic ties. “If you’ve been hurt in the past, don’t paint your partner a certain way because of that,” suggests Bilotta. For example, don’t stereotype your new partner as a cheater just because your ex was.

Get to Work (On Yourself)

Before you start dating, fill your life with things that make you happy and healthy rather than relying on a new partner to do that for you. Find a hobby, volunteer, exercise, travel, hang out with friends and make health and fitness a priority. Bonus: You’ll become more confident and, thus, even
more attractive.

Ask for What You Want

Don’t settle for less than what you want. For instance, if you’re looking for a boyfriend and your new man is only a booty call, move on. “If a guy wants to be with you, he’ll make time for you,” says Bilotta.

Have Fun

Try to enjoy the experience of meeting new people, visiting restaurants and trying new activities. Take it lightly and get out there as much as possible. If the thought of dating seems like the worst thing in the world right now, take a break because it should never feel like a chore.

How to Find Your New Relationship

Online dating used to be taboo, but now it’s a popular method for meeting potential partners. Bilotta recommends sites and phone apps such as Our Time, Match, eHarmony and Bumble for women over 40. When initiating a chat, reference something in your match’s profile so that he knows you’ve read it and will be more likely to respond. Bilotta also recommends chatting only three or four times before scheduling a date. She suggests that you don’t wait too long to meet somebody, as it could be a waste of time if there’s no spark in person.