I am supposed to be in bed… but I can’t sleep. A few weeks ago I found a lump in my breast doing a regular monthly self exam. Since then I have had an emergency ultrasound, mammo and MRI… they aren’t really sure what it is. So now I’m waiting to see if a core biopsy will be scheduled before I go back to see my surgeon on September 2. The MRI did find a node on my thyroid, so today I had an ultrasound on that too. Hmm… I am hoping all these little bumps and lumps are just normal everyday things that everybody gets and are told to go home, chill and relax. It’s easier said then done for me now. I don’t trust the machines to give me reliable results as it was only by fluke that my breast cancer was caught at all; it didn’t show up on a mammo, or ultrasound, and you certainly could not feel it – it was a breast cyst (or so they told me) but they were wrong.
Before breast cancer I didn’t like to be touched by strangers. Now, I could hire out as a professional stripper. I can flash those girls for anybody… I have been to approximately 140 medical appointments in the last two years. Getting well and staying well is a full-time job.
I have to make my body stronger and healthier. Oprah makes it look so easy with the cooks who whip up healthy little dinners for her, or her personal trainers running beside her…but what about us everyday people who don’t have that support system behind us? Who does our makeup and hair, and gets us out the door on time for work? Where do we find the time to fit it all in? Our medical system will “treat” cancer, but there is no medical “wellness program” to help us land back on our feet to get fit and healthy. Just a little crazy, don’t you think? I have been told they are not billable hours as there is no medical illness to treat.
So “we” are responsible for our health… makes sense, I guess. That’s why I picked up Best Health magazine in the first place. I said to myself, “Girlfriend, you have got to get it together” – it’s now or never.
I am off to bed to try to get some rest. I have vacation days next week that I am looking forward to… some laughter and fun with my dear husband is exactly what I need.
Jordan is a Best Health reader and guest blogger. Find links to all of her posts on the Breast Cancer Blog home page.